| Organised religion | Okay, the advantages of being told what to do all the time are obvious, it saves you having to think about awkward things like morality, so you can switch your brain off and just bowl along from cradle to grave without rocking the boats of the powers that be. And that's just how they like it. The Roman Catholic Church, for example, supported the Nazis and the Fascists, persecuted just about everyone, whilst all the time buggering choirboys and squandering it's massive wealth as it's followers wallowed in poverty under the threat of burning in Hell for all eternity just for using a condom. But putting a nail bomb on a bus full of non-Catholic schollchildren is just fine. "Three Hail Marys my son." And as for those Human Rights loving Muslim mother-fuckers, don't even get me started... |
| Religion | "You must respect other people's beliefs". BOLLOCKS. I should respect people who believe that everything was created by some guy with a beard who lives in the clouds?! And when we die we go to live in the clouds too and sprout wings?! Unless we've been 'bad' of course, in which case we get to burn and be tortured forever in the centre of the Earth. Yeah, right. If a grown-up believed in Father Christmas they'd get laughed at... Plus, you don't get atheists knocking you out of bed on a Sunday morning when you've got a hangover. |
| Superstition and other general stupidity | "What starsign are you?" Yeah, a completely unrelated set of stars, lumped together because some people thousands of years ago thought "that looks a bit like an ox", determine that I'm going to meet a tall dark strager today. I told that to the aliens that abducted me and they just laughed. |
| Smoking | As adictive as heroin, it kills far more people than all illegal drugs combined, and for why? Does it give you a big kick? Do you see amazing colours and dragons coming out of the walls? Or does it just make you stink like a pub ash-tray? There's a 50% chance that it will kill you, it'll certainly lower your quality of life and cost a shit-load of money in the process. Not that I'm for banning the foul shit, but why should I be made to suffer because of somebody else's weakness? |
| Tobacco companies | The U.S. government sends attack helicopters after the big drug cartels, but then the drugs cartels don't pay billions of dollars in tax to them, do they? One third of people in British hospitals are there as a consequence of smoking. A junior Tory (right-wing) minister was interviewed about this, and, with uncharacteristic (but brutal) honesty, he explained that although the cost to the Health Service of all those people with their self-inflicted sicknesses was greater than the tax revenues from tobacco, you had to take into account the money smokers save the government in pensions by dying sooner... |
| Dumb patriotism | Together with religion, the other main cause of strife in the world. "My country is better than your country". But, odds are, if they'd have been born in that other country, they'd prefer that one instead. So, what they are really saying is that whatever country they, by accident of birth, were born into, is the best. Which is patent crap, it's totally subjective. The only time you can respect that sort of opinion is when they choose a country other than the one they were born/raised in, that shows that at least there's been some thought involved. |
| Royalty | A family of unelected mega-rich in-breds who are "chosen by God". No thanks. |
| Repression | As long as what I do doesn't piss on somebody else, why the hell should some government tell me what I can or cannot do? It doesn't mean that they have to like it or have to do it or have it done to them, it's my business, not theirs. |
| Vulvos | Swedish-made tanks driven by middle-class, middle-aged boring people in a day-dream and on the phone. The natural enemy of all sportsbike riders. |
| Shirley fucking Davidsons | They don't go, they don't stop and they don't corner. They're just for sad old men trying to live in some crappy fantasy world of nasty chrome and leather tassles. Know that all real bikers laugh at these losers. |
| Body hair | Euuuugh! Shave it off!!!! |
| Amerikkka | Land of the Dumb. |
