* We need = I Want

* It´s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

* Do what you want? = You´ll pay for it later

* We need to talk = I need to complain

* Sure... go ahead = I don´t want you to

* I´m not upset = Of course I´m upset, you moron.

* You´re... so manly = You need to shave and you sweat a lot.

* You´re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

* I´m not emotional! And I´m not overreacting! = I´m on my period.

* Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.

* This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.

* I want new curtains...= and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...

* I need wedding shoes = the other 40 pairs are the wrong shade of white.

* Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!

* I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleeep.

* Do you love me? = I´m going to ask for something expensive.

* How much do you love me? = I did something today you´re really not going to like.

* I´ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

* Is my butt fat? = Tell me I´m beautiful.

* You have to learn to communicate = You have to learn to agree with me.

* Are you listening to me!? = (To late. You´re dead.)

* Yes = No

* No = No

* Maybe = No

* I´m sorry = You´ll be sorry.

* Do you like this recipe? = It´s easy to fix, so you´d better get used to it.

* Was that the baby? = Why don´t you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep.

* I´m not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

In answer to "What´s wrong?", the same old  = nothing

* Nothing = Everything

* Everything = My PMS is acting up.

* Nothing, really = You´re such an asshole!

* I don´t want to talk about it = I´m not ready to yell at you yet.